Friday, November 30, 2007

Illuminations de Noël à Paris

Some pretty photos of the Illuminations de Noël à Paris Above is the dressed up Mouffetard,

During the Christmas season
The City of Light (La Ville-lumière) truly lives up to its nickname:
Cette année, 50 rues et places de 30 quartiers de la capitale s'illuminent pour Noël grâce à l'opération 'Paris illumine Paris'.

'I'm Not There': Dylan by any other name


Decoding Dylan Who's who in the new Todd Haynes film.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Hey, it's not rocket science, dudes.


Last night I watched Brotherhood, one of my favourite shows. It was the Thanksgiving episode; it did not look like the picture above and that's what pissed me off. Rose, the matriarch, bugged out with a vibrator and fur-lined handcuffs looking for action elsewhere (and she found it. Yuck!). Her family, two sons, a daughter, a nephew and their partners and kids freak out because not one of the feeble group knows how to cook a turkey and vegetables. The pumpkin pies and cranberry sauce are store bought. What's the deal here? They've helped Rose out with holiday dinners; some of them have prepared meals for their own families night after night after night for years. They can't make some peas and mashed potatoes and shove a fowl in the oven? Who wrote the script? Obviously someone who's never set foot in a kitchen. The Brotherhood broads should have been able to get that dinner on the table if they were stoned, one hand tied behind their backs and bullets flying. I know I could.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

I read this tshirt and it spoiled everything

Via

Ho, Ho, Noooooo!


Who wants to break the sad news to the kids? It looks like Santa's facial features have been ripped off by some aggressive beast, cherry nose, beady eyes and all. It's unlikely that he'll be fit to perform his Christmas duties this year. However, after a little plastic surgery, he should be able to resume all his activities in time for the 2008 holiday season . We can only hope that he doesn't use the cosmetic surgeon used by Kanye West's mother.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

As if!

It would take 13 glasses of Red Wine to kill me

I had more than 13 glasses before I took this frickin' quiz and I think I'm still alive.

Jim Dupree: Chips Enthusiast


Jim Dupree is a chipanzee. There is little he doesn't know about this humble root vegetable, whether it be the bagged or tubed variety, and what he doesn't know he makes up. I admit to sharing his salty enthusiasm.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Salsa Celtica


Via Optical Poptitude

Death on a Plate

I saw this article at Coudal and just reading this list made me feel uncomfortably full.

What's the worst food in America? That would be the Outback Steakhouse Aussi cheese fries with ranch dressing with 2,900 calories, 182 g fat and 240 g carbs.

Is that the best those wimps could come up with? They should have come to Quebec where dressed up poutine makes those Aussi fries look like health food. Even American Bacchus, Anthony Bourdain, found the poutine with foie gras somewhat excessive: "It's like driving down Hollywood Blvd. naked, wearing a cowboy hat and holding a white castle hamburger in one hand, having sex with two hookers while listening to ZZ Top. Total trash." That, I think, says it all.

Who knew?

Using compact fluorescent bulbs?
Turns out, CFLs have a black mark against an otherwise green record. They contain mercury - between four and six milligrams each. Don't stop using them - they are still the better choice. Home Depot will be accepting CFLs for recycling at all their locations.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

How Moral Are You?

Does your everyday life often present difficult choices?
The Morality Quiz puts your dilemmas in perspective.

Via Metafilter

The Nag is a cover girl!

If I'd known they were going to put my face out there I would have tweezed my eyebrows!

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

Via J-Walk



Don't call any of these if you're hungry now

In Pictures: Ten Tough-To-Score Reservations
Most of these spots require reservations 1 -2 months in advance. El Bulli will make you wait a little longer: the restaurant is already fully booked for the 2008 season.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Don't let the sun go down on me

Eternal Sunset endeavours to ensure you can enjoy the sunset live from any location, at any time. As the sunset moves westward, Eternal Sunset continuously tunes into different webcams, chasing the sunset around the globe.

Via
Design Observer

Canada vs America

Blogs End. Awesomeness Doesn’t.

Your Daily Awesome, one of my favourite blogs is, alas, no more. I'm gonna miss it

Friday, November 23, 2007

Desiderata for bloggers

Some of you may be old and wizened enough to recall the Desiderata posters that adorned the walls of every student dorm and hippie squat back in the day. This Desiderata for bloggers is brilliant:

Stumble aimlessly amid the trolls and waste, but remember what peace there be in staring at your toes for a couple of weeks. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all readers. Publish your posts quietly and clearly, and listen to podcasts, even the dull and garbled, for they too have a right to hog bandwidth. Avoid loud and aggressive bloggers. They are pains in the ass.

Read it all...


Via Raincoaster

Left Wing Fun


Create A Commie
The most fun you'll ever have with metal shavings and a magnetic wand!

(Maybe I shouldn't be offering this irresistable temptation on Buy Nothing Day?)

Buy Nothing Day


Buy Nothing Day
A 24 hour moratorium on consumer spending - participate by not participating

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Oxymoronic List

A long list of Oxymorons.
This one stands out: Apple tech support .
Having recently dealt with the Apple help line, I definitely have to call oxymoron on that one!

Via Presurfer

Meta-Joke

A newlywed couple, a blind man, an Iranian mullah, a chicken, a used car dealer, Judith Regan, a proctologist, and a Hollywood starlet, along with a nun, a man who just received a gorilla brain transplant, two Hassidic Jews, a stuttering hotel clerk, and a can of Spam are riding in a compact car.
Suddenly, they hear a siren and a state trooper motions the vehicle to pull over. 'License and registration,' says the cop. 'You've exceeded the legal character limit in this joke.'

From Futility Closet via Grow-a-Brain

It's a Hit



Any chimp can play human for a day.
Use his opposable thumbs to iron his uniform
and run for office on election day
fancy himself a real decision maker
and deploy more troops than salt in a shaker.

Via Blort

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Hollywood celebs in solidarity with striking writers



Via Uncorrected Proofs

Who Smells?



Damn, I'm good! I blew the Kiss/Queen question and admit to guessing at some of the others. I'm not a fragrance fanatic although I've been known to give myself a spritz of D & G's Sicily when I'm feeling particularly festive.

A fowl rap video for my American friends

Bergdorf Goodman Holiday Windows 2007

Here are some extravagantly festive holiday windows found at Curiology. I like the dancing alligator below- he's the ultimate in urban sophistication.

2008 Shaw Festival Films

I enjoy being able to walk down the street to see these films, have a glass of wine and see all my townie friends. I'm not familiar with many of this year's selections but I've liked almost every film I've seen at Shaw the two previous years so I plan on taking most of these in. Feel free to recommend any you've seen and liked.









Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Visiting the UK? Watch out for exploding bladders!

A new report in The Guardian says binge drinking has increased to such an extent that cases of 'exploding bladders' are on the rise in the UK.

Women, in an ill-advised bid for sexual equality, are bellying up to the bar and matching their male mates drink for drink. The result is an epidemic of bladder explosions. Someone should advise these gals to take a tinkle break now and again .

Mmmmm Meat!




Vintage publicity posters from Negroni .

Monday, November 19, 2007

I want to (insert verb here) with the animals

Saucy Orangina Ad

Via

Bind my Kewpie

Looks like Steve's been expanding his kink collection - again.


My needles are clicking

As I mentioned in my earlier post my aunt has a gazillion old knitting patterns (she doesn't know they're retro, she thinks they're very au courant). I found the one below particularly captivating. I can almost hear this lad saying, "Ahoy maties, the bar is that-a-way. The cowboy, the Indian and the construction worker are waiting there for us."

I'd better start knitting if I want to get this sweater done for Mr. Nag by Christmas. He'll appreciate the fact that this pattern is endorsed by both the Canadian Red Cross and the Imperial Order of Daughters of the Empire.







I'm back

I just returned from 5 days in Montreal where I spent most of my time cleaning my aunt's apartment before she goes into a nursing home. I tossed about 20 garbage bags but barely touched the clutter. My aunt is a hoarder par excellence and every inch of her living space is filled with things she feels she might use some day. She's on oxygen and can barely walk from her bed to the bathroom but still manages to accumulate "stuff". She sends neighbours to the dollar store and rummage sales to forage for her. Rubbermaid containers full of Christmas ornaments and potential gifts, St. Patrick's day leprechauns and shamrocks, knitting patterns from the 50s, paper napkins, cards and wrap for every occasion and much, much more line her walls from floor to ceiling. It's hard to convey the magnitude of the situation. She has plastic containers full of plastic containers and bags full of bags of every description - overnight bags, makeup bags, courier bags - you get the picture. The discouraging thing is that the next time I visit her she will have replaced everything I threw out.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Drinking green

Our thirst for wines from far-off countries is bad for the planet. Carbon emissions associated with shipping beverages around the world contribute greatly to global warming.

Dr. Vino calculates the carbon footprint of wine:
There’s a “green line” that runs down the middle of Ohio. For points to the West of that line, it is more carbon efficient to consume wine trucked from California. To the East of that line, it’s more efficient to consume the same sized bottle of wine from Bordeaux, which has had benefited from the efficiencies of container shipping, followed by a shorter truck trip.

Living in the heart of the Niagara Wine Region I suppose the ecologically correct tipple would be wines from local wineries (to which I would cycle). I have to admit that I mostly drink French reds but if I'm drinking white wine I choose the off-dry Riesling from Cave Spring Cellars in Jordan, an excellent local winery. After reading this article I'll endeavour to drink more Niagara reds. Yeah, lots more!

Calling all hoarders

What to do with a stack of old floppy discs



Flocking Starlings

The last couple of mornings while walking along the Niagara Parkway I've been amazed by the enormous swarms of starlings forming intricate visual displays. The sound they make is also incredible. Unfortunately I didn't have my camera but I found this video that shows some starlings indulging in really remarkable behaviour.

Seeing the huge numbers of the birds it's hard to believe that North American starlings are all descended from 60 birds freed in Central Park by wealthy pharmacologist Eugene Schieffelin in the 1890s.

Monday, November 12, 2007

How Open Minded Are You?

You Are 60% Open Minded

You are a very open minded person, but you're also well grounded.
Tolerant and flexible, you appreciate most lifestyles and viewpoints.
But you also know where you stand firm, and you can draw that line.
You're open to considering every possibility - but in the end, you stand true to yourself.


Via

Where would we be without rubber bands and velcro?

101 gadgets that changed the world
From abacus to zipper, a collection of mostly indispensable inventions. However I challenge the inclusion of Post-it notes on the list.

Via Coudal

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Coen Brothers Slide Show


No Country Slide Show
The strivers, weirdos, beauties, believers and would-be prophets from the films of the Coen Brothers.

Looking for a place to eat tonight?

The 50 sexiest places to be fed offers up the best places in the world to grab a nibble and a nosh.
Michelin-starred restaurants in Paris, a pretty 18th-century coaching inn in Durham and an all-night kebab shop in London - eating out has never been sexier.

Don't have a sweetie to share the experience? Never fear; although Bordo was suggested with the more adventurous couple in mind the solitary diner might also find romance (or a reasonable facsimile thereof) here:
The most risque recommendation we got? From Mourad Mazouz, owner of Sketch. Apparently if you go to Bordo in Moscow, a restaurant and, ahem, gentleman's club, naked women will drape themselves around as you eat. Rooms for 'private use' are available by the hour, if it all gets a bit too much.

Remembrance Day Posters


Each year Veterans Affairs Canada commissions the design of a poster to commemorate Veterans' Week. It is hoped that these posters will remind Canadians of the sacrifices and achievements made by Canada's veterans, during times of war and peace.

See more Remembrance Day Posters

Saturday, November 10, 2007

You have issues with food? Stay home!

Just read this New York Times article on the current crop of food fascists, top dog in my menagerie of my pet peeves. Anyone who knows me will agree that I am far from perfect but I eat what's put in front of me, never ask for substitutions (even in a restaurant) and if I'm fortunate enough to be a guest in someone's home would never be so rude as to dictate what I am to be fed. If people want to be food primadonnas they should pass on dinner invitations altogether; they should stay home where they can sup on gruel or low-fat tasteless fare to their heart's content. The behaviour described below is rude and insulting and anyone who did this in my house would never be invited back (and yes, in case you're wondering, I am foaming at the mouth right now):
Nothing over the course of many years of having dinner parties prepared me for the list, provided without request, by the couple I invited to my new Los Angeles home. It contained the items they would not consume: no red meat; no dairy; fish only if grilled, but no salmon; and please, no button mushrooms. Once at my table to eat their prenegotiated meal of grilled tuna and dry couscous, the husband spotted flecks of garlic in the mango salsa and recoiled, demanding to know if he had indeed spied a mote of cheese.

LOLinate me!


The Nag has been LOLinated and you can do it, too.
Thanks Karen

At a loss for the right word?

English is a rich and wonderful language - but sometimes it's just not good enough. You might have to go international to find that perfect phrase. I'm adding these gems to my vocabulary pronto:

  • Pesamenteiro - Portuguese: one who joins groups of mourners at the home of a dead person, apparently to offer condolences but in reality is just there for the refreshments.
  • Gamadj - Obibway, North America: dancing with a scalp in one's hands, in order to receive presents.
  • Dona - Yamana, Chile: to take lice from a person's head and squash between one's teeth.
  • Baffona - Italian: an attractive moustachioed woman.
  • Layogenic - Tagalog, Philippines: a person who is only good looking from a distance.
  • Du Kannst Mir Gern Den Buckel Runterrutschen Und Mit Der Zunge Bremsen - Austrian German: abusive insult, literally "you can slide down my hunchback using your tongue as a brake".

These weird and wonderful foreign phrases and more via Dark Roasted Blend.

Decorating with meat, cake, stuffed squirrels and more

Design*Sponge sneak peek: amy sedaris
No surprises here. Amy's place looks exactly as I'd pictured it.
Via Coudal

Friday, November 09, 2007

Arthur Bremer, Model For Taxi Driver Assasin, Is Freed

Arthur Bremer, Who Shot Wallace, Is Freed
Of all the protagonists in America’s horrible string of high-profile political assassinations and attempts in the 1960’s, 1970’s and early 1980’s, Arthur H. Bremer, who tried to kill Gov. George C. Wallace of Alabama, appears to be the first and only one to become a free man again. He was released on parole today in Maryland.

Ever wonder what happened to all those assassins and wannabe assassins from the 60s, 70s and early 80s? Find out here.

Happy Birthday Rolling Stone!


Read the 40th anniversary edition for free.

A blog about a dead bird

The Adventures of Burd:
Meet Burd... So here's the dead Burd that started it all....my friend Glendene took this pic of a (posed) dead bird while in Kentucky and left it up to my 'mad skills' on Microsoft Publisher to jazz the little dude up...

Here he is after a night on the town.


Via Blort

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Connie hates Peter... and his silly hat


Conrad Black doesn't like Peter Newman's writing nor does he care for his hat. In the National Post article, A Peddler Of Gossip, Well Past His Prime Black gives Newman a verbal horsewhipping:
Newman claimed an intimate knowledge of my wife's and my sex lives, with each other and elsewhere. He knows nothing of these subjects; the passages are frequently defamatory. Only a qualified psychotherapist could say what would possess an author who takes himself seriously to write such drivel. His principal comment on my current legal travails has been to regale Canadian television viewers with predictions that I will spend many years being sexually assaulted in U.S. correctional institutions. I think not, but I will leave that one also to the psychotherapists.

And this paragraph is even more cruel:
Now 78, shambling about in his ridiculous sailor's cap, bilious and at least verbally incontinent, Newman is pitiful, but not at all sympathetic. Canada and Canadian letters and journalism would benefit from his subsidence.
I sincerely hope that Newman responds with a figurative bitch slap. I'll keep you posted.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Which Stella trailer is your favourite?

The folks at Stella Artois noticed my post about one of their excellent little videos and thought you guys might be interested in voting for your favourite trailer. You can do so here if you're so inclined.

Automatic Dog Washer

Automatic Dog Washer



I think most dogs would be frightened of this machine unless the humanoid entered the capsule along with the canine (as one guy did).

If you film it…

21 good books that need to be great films, like now

I've read 7 of the 21 books:



After discussing this at length (with myself) I have to agree that, in the right hands, every one of these would make a great movie. I'm especially looking forward to seeing the film version of The Time Traveller's Wife. The whole time I was reading it I was thinking, "This would make a great movie."

Works of philatelic art

These are beautiful but (alas) I still need to look at the letters as I type so it wouldn't work for me.
Stamp Keyboardvia boingboing

Darth Vader In Love



Via

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Wheee!

The always interesting deputydog features a nifty collection of 9 creative staircases.
I already have a storage staircase in my home but what I'd really like to have is one of these:

I must have one!


USB Mini Vacuum Cleaner "The brown/beige 8 inches high plastic USB Desk Vacuum ($20) will keep your desk free from and dust and crumbs in a cool retro style."

Via B.A.'s Weblog

Monday, November 05, 2007

VectorMagic

The vectorized Nag


VectorMagic via Presurfer

"Happy Counterterrorism Day"

"Happy Counterterrorism Day" by Scott Horton (Harper's Magazine)

Remember, remember the fifth of November,
The gunpowder, treason and plot,
I know of no reason
Why gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot
Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, ’twas his intent
To blow up the King and Parliament.
Three score barrels of powder below,
Poor old England to overthrow;
By God’s providence he was catch’d
With a dark lantern and burning match.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, make the bells ring.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!
Hip hip hoorah!

A penny loaf to feed the Pope.
A farthing o’ cheese to choke him.
A pint of beer to rinse it down.
A faggot of sticks to burn him.
Burn him in a tub of tar.
Burn him like a blazing star.
Burn his body from his head.
Then we’ll say ol’ Pope is dead.
Hip hip hoorah!
Hip hip hoorah hoorah!

via Reddit

Lord Crumwell's Oddfellows



History's most compelling characters. Now in a convenient pocket size.
Jailbreak Toys via BB Blog

Fast-forward through the boring parts of life

Sprint Waitless : tips that will refund your time and amaze your friends.
Via Verbatim

Sunday, November 04, 2007

I'm mad yet well-beloved

I'm Charles the Mad. Sclooop.
Which Historical Lunatic Are You?
From the fecund loins of Rum and Monkey.
A fine, amiable and dreamy young man, skilled in horsemanship and archery, you were also from a long line of dribbling madmen. King at 12 and quickly married to your sweetheart, Bavarian Princess Isabeau, you enjoyed many happy months together before either of you could speak anything of the other's language. However, after illness you became a tad unstable. When a raving lunatic ran up to your entourage spouting an incoherent prophecy of doom, you were unsettled enough to slaughter four of your best men when a page dropped a lance. Your hair and nails fell out. At a royal masquerade, you and your courtiers dressed as wild men, ending in tragedy when four of them accidentally caught fire and burned to death. You were saved by the timely intervention of the Duchess of Berry's underskirts.

This brought on another bout of sickness, which surgeons countered by drilling holes in your skull. The following months saw you suffer an exorcism, beg your friends to kill you, go into hyperactive fits of gaiety, run through your rooms to the point of exhaustion, hide from imaginary assassins, claim your name was Georges, deny that you were King and fail to recognise your family. You smashed furniture and wet yourself at regular intervals. Passing briefly into erratic genius, you believed yourself to be made of glass and demanded iron rods in your attire to prevent you breaking.

In 1405 you stopped bathing, shaving or changing your clothes. This went on until several men were hired to blacken their faces, hide, jump out and shout "boo!", upon which you resumed basic hygiene. Despite this, your wife continued sleeping with you until 1407, when she hired a young beauty, Odette de Champdivers, to take her place. Isabeau then consoled herself, as it were, with your brother. Her lovers followed thick and fast while you became a pawn of your court, until you had her latest beau strangled and drowned.

A severe fever was fended off with oranges and pomegranates in vast quantities, but you succumbed again in 1422 and died. Your disease was most likely hereditary. Unfortunately, you had anywhere up to eleven children, who variously went on to develop capriciousness, great cruelty, insecurity, paranoia, revulsion towards food and, in one case, a phobia of bridges.

I'm thinking of blogging less and bocking more

Does this look like fun or what?



You can now leap up to 6 feet, run lightening speeds up to 23 MPH with ease and take 9-foot strides like Steve Austin’s Six Million Dollar Bionic Man with recent aerospace employed technology using Velocity Stilts for a new sport coined as ‘Bocking’ or ‘Powerbocking.’

Read more about it at Life in the Fast Lane

Naughty Fairies

Link
When I was a little nag I used to love fairy stories with their pretty pictures of gauzy-winged gentle creatures. My all time favourite was the Flower Fairies series. I'm not sure what I would have made of Tessa Farmer's Miniature Worlds.
Farmer's creatures acknowledge the nastier side of childhood imagination, the antithesis of the Victorian notions of fantasy they seem to emulate.


Found this at Dark Roasted Blend

Friday, November 02, 2007

Washoe the chimpanzee has died

RIP Washoe :
Scientists have announced the death of the first animal to break the language barrier, a female chimpanzee called Washoe who could communicate 250 words in human sign language.

The most expensive junk food


The DB "Royale" double truffle burger
Celebrity chef Daniel Bouloud gave this all-American dish a fancy French makeover and a couture price tag. His version of the classic ground beef burger is stuffed with red wine-braised short ribs (off the bone), foie gras, a mix of root vegetables and preserved black truffle.
Sounds tasty but would you pay $120.00 for it?

Via

The History Of LOLCats

An educational documentary for you.
http://view.break.com/392548
Via The Presurfer

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Amazing! That's exactly what I was before I became a wastrel!

You Should Be a Social Worker

You are deeply caring and empathetic.
You are able to take on other people's problems as if they were your own.
Sensitive and intuitive, you understand human emotions well.
Helping others gives you the most joy in life. You feel like it's your purpose in life.

You do best when you:

- Have a lot of responsibility
- Greatly impact someone's life with your work

You would also be a good philanthropist or stay at home parent.

Where have all the children gone?

It's as if the Pied Piper of Hamlyn came and spirited them away. For the 4th year in a row not one trick or treater has come to our door! We buy candy and Baby Nag carves a pumpkin, hoping to appeal to little hobgoblins but all for naught. I'm thinking that the street buzz goes something like this, "Whatever you do don't go to ** Johnson St. A crazy old Nag lives there and she'll put you in a cage and fatten you up and eat you for breakfast, leaving your tasty brains for last."