Japanese Inventor Offers Weaponized Wig to Trump

Celebrity inventor and “Greatest Scientist in History” Dr. NakaMats throws his support behind the Republican front-runner in the form of the mightiest weapon known to man: Guard Wig. The Guard Wig was originally created as a tool to prevent molestation with the first models available in blond and dark brown. However, this time Dr. Nakagawa has created a new one suited just for the billionaire’s specific tones and highlights.

The diagrams from Guard Wig’s patent show it with and without metal spikes
and shows how it may easily be thrown from the top of the user’s head.

The wig contains a chunk of iron inside (possibly with spikes) along with a coiled strap that can be used to retrieve it after being thrown at the fallen enemy.
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