What's his problem?

I'm no Michael Vick or anything but I will admit to tormenting my dog lately. "It's for his own good," I tell myself but I'm beginning to wonder.
Max used to sleep in Nag Jr's old room but Jr has returned from Brazil and has reclaimed the room for the next little while so Max has been sleeping on the hard floor. We purchased a large cushion for him because we worry about his comfort (See, Max, this is how much we love you!). How does he express his gratitude? He avoids the cushion as if it were an electrified fence.
I've been trying to lure him onto the cushion by lying on it, making little kissing sounds, holding out treats and calling to him in a high pitched voice (yes, I look like a total ass). He slinks over, the whites of his eyes showing in fear, prostrates himself beside the cushion but won't join me on it; he snatches the treat and runs away.
Mr. Nag tries to help. He strokes the cushion like it's Angelina Jolie's breast and croons to Max about the fine qualities possessed by this magnificent dog bed. Still no dice.
In the picture below I rolled him on to the edge of it but I know he's plotting his escape. He's probably thinking we've finally lost our minds. I don't know what to try next - I've done everything but don a negligee and offer him a martini.