How To Do Some Idiotic Things

The Road to Turducken

Learn how to make Jesus toast, spinach cigarettes, guest soaps from bacon, even pruno (prison wine that will win over even the most hardened prison bitch). I had no idea that making turducken was so complicated. Add it to the list of things my dinner guests have learned to do without: witty repartee, charming ambiance and hosts who can still speak and stand at the end of the evening.