Personal Mottos That Haven’t Quite Worked Out for Me

  • Dance like the shards of that Chartreuse bottle on the floor pose no danger to you, even though you were down there mere seconds ago, confirming that you do not possess the ability to spin on your head.
  • If you’re going through hell, might as well see what Tinder is like there.
  • Live each day as if you didn’t kill the bottle of mystery liqueur you started drinking as a joke last night.
More mottos: The New Yorker

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