Nicknames

As Mr. Nag and I slip into our twilight years we sometimes find ourselves unable to remember the names of people we have recently met so we refer to them in a code only we can understand - sort of like twin-speak only in this case it could be called old-speak. One fellow who bears an unfortunate resemblance to the kid diddler in the movie "Little Children" is known to us as "The Pedophile". Another, who made the mistake of dressing as a woman one Halloween, is "The Transvestite". The strange guy whose name I never knew but who stops me on the street to talk politics we have dubbed "The Pundit". The plasterer down the street is called "Phil", short for "Phil McCrackin" (fill my crack in, get it?). So far we have been able to keep any references to "The Pedophile" and "The Transvestite" between ourselves and have thus avoided being sued.
Years ago I knew a fellow who was 6'8" and shambled along in a distinctive fashion reminiscent of a certain Adams Family character; he also, I'm sad to say, bore similar facial features. He was christened with the obvious nickname and was seldom referred to, at least when he was out of earshot, by his given name. I knew the nicknaming thing had gone too far when I heard someone introducing the fellow to some colleagues as "Lurch".
I wonder what people call me when I'm not around? I shudder to think about it.

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